No Hard Feelings

i wish i could have been better for us both — but, at the time, i didn’t feel great either.

what hurts the most is how you hold me at arm’s length, keep yourself from me. and i wonder:

am i just a body to you?

“i am not perfect, and i do not expect you to be that way. i only wish that you could see me in my fullness.”

if i may be so bold as to ask: for what do you wish? hope? need?

would you like me out of your life for good? for me to cheer you on as you perform? or, do you wish for me to help you bring in more? see me as an artist and partner?

please, just be honest.

because, regardless of what you decide, i will continue on. learning and growing. never becoming bitter. always protecting the precious, and caring for those in need.

I’m not perfect, and i don’t expect you to be that way, either. i only wish that you could see me in my fullness. who i am at the core. that we might find out what we’re made of,

together.

This piece was originally published Aug. 7, 2020